Drunk Texts to Myself: Volume II - Trevor Moore

Drunk texts to myself

Messages through time

I don’t remember any of these

What was going through my mind?

Drunk texts to myself

Subconscious to my phone

What are these supposed to mean?

Should’ve left this thing at home

Captain Crunch origin movie

(Captain Crunch)

Learn karate so you can teach it without all of the bullshit

(Learn Karate)

IHOP established after second world pancake war

(There was so much blood)

Sex addiction is a serious disease that assholes get

(Not truly something that you really have to cope with)

The 7−11 guy knows a fireworks guy

(Thank you Ju’ar Halar)

Hey ladies, the airport is not a slumber party

(Sweatpants)

Bill Clinton makes a peanut butter and jelly sandwich by himself in the kitchen

at night

(Oooooo)

He puts doritos in the sandwich and eats it standing up: Staring off into space

(Oooooo SAXOPHONE UP IN HERE)

Drunk texts to myself

(THANK YOU!)

Messages through time

I don’t remember any of these

What was going through my mind?

Drunk texts to myself

Subconscious to my phone

What are these supposed to mean?

Should’ve left this thing at home

Gauges in peoples ears are a good way to gauge who you not to get into a

conversation with

(I don’t wanna talk to this gutter punk)

They haven’t made new strip club billboards since the mid 90's

(Lazer fonts and cottony bangs)

Never go to that bar again;

They’re all assholes and refuse to apologize if Amy

makes you

(I feel regrets)

Pitbull is playing on the 18th

(Nope. No no.

(a-Woo hoo! Woo hoo!)

When high, always think about that dead monkey in the spaceship

(Cause that’s what gets me off)

I know you can’t get AIDS from toilet seat but if you could I would have

totally just got AIDS

(ugh)

From the 4th Dimension’s POV we’re all literally the same organism because they

are outside of time and see us as a connected branch of life where are one with

our ancestors and descendants.

(Testify to the third eye)

Drunk texts to myself

Messages through time

I don’t remember any of these

What was going through my mind?

Drunk texts to myself

Another volume here

These are the texts I’ve sent

Myself in the last year

Love, Timmy