Breath Control - Recoil

Who wouldn’t want a good girl, a soft hand

A gentle woman for a gentleman?

He said, «It's been fine so far but after a while

I want more than a soft style

I want some slashes

To go with those long eyelashes.

«And so the bedroom became the black room

But a year later he wanted something more

Something I wasn’t quite prepared for

He said, «Every woman has an itch

And every nice girl secretly wants to switch.

"

«I like how the skins look on your white hands

I’d like you to deliver one of my demands.

«He said, «Every woman has an itch

And every nice girl wants to switch.

«He led me in and lit the room with a hundred candles

And said «God never gives you more than you can handle.»

I sat astride his chest, «It's just a thrill,» he said

As he relaxed on the dark, dark bed, «it's just breath control.»

He whispered «Hold me here» and I did and his head fell back

He whispered «Press harder» and I did and his eyes rolled back

It’s just breath control.

Just breath control

I saw him go pale.

I saw him seize up

I felt something creep up like a taste for this

Like a reward

A kind of love

A kind of lustmord

It was a minute then three then five then ten

He wasn’t coming up again

I held on for twelve

I saw him seize and thrash and twist

And when he was still, I lifted away my wrists

And looked at my hands

And tried to understand

«It's just a thrill» I said

As he relaxed on the dark, dark bed

I sat aside his chest

«It's just a thrill,» he said

«just a thrill.

It’s just breath control.»

When it was over, I slipped off the skins

And drowned them in the river where we used to swim

And a year later in a shop, I was stopped by a man

He said, «I know you’re looking for something that’s hard to find

And I think I have what you have in mind.

«And he led me to a glass case

And looked deep into my face…

«It's just… control.»