Ex-Prayers - Kaonashi

After all these years, I find myself here

Same chances, different feeling

We want what we can’t have, I have nothing

I’ve learned to live with misery, and that’s saying something

See, I’ve been walking on walls, I’ve been sleeping on ceilings

Just to explain my pain, just to justify the meaning

After all these years, I find myself here

Same chances, different feeling

We want what we can’t have, andI have nothing

I’ve learned to live with misery, and that’s saying something

But what’s it saying?

I was always told to be myself, but what if I don’t like myself?

What if I just feel so

Insecure, selfish, scared, ugly, embarrassed, and worthless

Permanent damage made from temporary feelings

I ask myself, was it worth it?

Everybody’s happy but me, everyone has someone but me

My life is a lose, lose, lose, lose, lose situation, I lose track of time

When I think of the past

I lose my sense of direction when I think about the future

So I’m screaming out all my ex-prayers

All the bullshit that got me here

I wish I was a better person

I wish she loved me

See, it’s all pretend in the end

It’s all make believe

All those things I wished so hard for

I didn’t need

And all the people I tried to impress

That just looked down on me