What Am I Waiting For - K. Stone

The bitter autumn winds brings back a past

That speaks of beats that I used to blast

On the streets where a movies chance fell down

And landed on my stranded ass in hell town

Now these visions of pain always echo the same

But this time around they brought with them the shame

That I might be in the circle once again

And that my delusions are what funds my sane

State of mind, did my time and I’m back for more

Ain’t no rehab to fix my damaged core

I’m wired wrong, my silent song comes out jumbled

The weekly supertask that leaves me crumbled

Pieces of a man, shit I pick it up like Reggie

Trynna stay slow and steady but my mind gets heavy

Either I snap on a beat, a homie or I bleed

I’m still in it tho but my legs are weak

I can’t keep on standin' (standin', standin')

When everything I’m plannin' (plannin', plannin)

Keeps on fallin' (fallin', fallin')

What am I waitin' for why am I stallin'

I can’t keep on standin' (standin', standin')

When everything I’m plannin' (plannin', plannin)

Keeps on fallin' (fallin', fallin')

What am I waitin' for why am I stallin'

Things are going good, why do I feel this way

I got hoes in my phone but it’s back to the same

Train of thought I’ve had for my present memory

If you know you know this unpleasant jeopardy

The feelin' of fallin' and passin' every target

The ceilin' was callin' and askin' for some scarlet

Not this day but I fall prey to the red eyes

Cuz what’s true when you learned you’ve been fed lies

All the happier moments just feels like betrayal

And you yearn for a time when things were the same

But they ain’t never comin' back and I know that

Hate to hear it but it’s a cold fact

So you bunker down and try to avoid any change

Cuz it never gets better so just settle for your range

That you know you can somewhat manage

But it crumbles again because of your baggage

I can’t keep on standin' (standin', standin')

When everything I’m plannin' (plannin', plannin)

Keeps on fallin' (fallin', fallin')

What am I waitin' for why am I stallin'

I can’t keep on standin' (standin', standin')

When everything I’m plannin' (plannin', plannin)

Keeps on fallin' (fallin', fallin')

What am I waitin' for why am I stallin'

Wake up, crack a can, cross the line in the sand

It’s man made anyway so who gives a damn

It ain’t about preservation it’s mitigation

It ain’t self harm it’s mental aviation

Can’t see myself when I look in the mirror

Can’t plan for this it just gets you nearer

To the edge cuz you put it on yourself

As a personal failin' instead of bad health

And everything’s connected in circuits

For example I don’t feel valued in my circles

Since I ain’t the best why would they opt for less

It ain’t true, but it causes stress

Anxiety and all kinds of chest unrests

All and all everyday’s just another test

So just keep on glowin'' even if feels like it’s slowin'

Time doesn’t stop it just keeps on goin'

I can’t keep on standin' (standin', standin')

When everything I’m plannin' (plannin', plannin)

Keeps on fallin' (fallin', fallin')

What am I waitin' for why am I stallin'

I can’t keep on standin' (standin', standin')

When everything I’m plannin' (plannin', plannin)

Keeps on fallin' (fallin', fallin')

What am I waitin' for why am I stallin'

I can’t keep on standin' (standin', standin')

When everything I’m plannin' (plannin', plannin)

Keeps on fallin' (fallin', fallin')

What am I waitin' for why am I stallin'

I can’t keep on standin' (standin', standin')

When everything I’m plannin' (plannin', plannin)

Keeps on fallin' (fallin', fallin')

What am I waitin' for why am I stallin'