Once in the Morning - Jimmy Webb

I was lyin' in state on my analyst’s couch

And I said, «Doc, I get the feeling

I’m becoming a grouch, you know

My arches are falling

And I’m developing a a slouch.»

He reached inside his hot pants

For his alligator pouch and he said

Once in the morning and once at night

I’m not sure that it will help you

But you’ll think it’s alright

Once in the afternoon and once at twilight

Once for the money and again 'round midnight

I was playing Las Vegas, I was feeling kinda flat

When Jan the Fan Dancer came by for a chat, you know

She loosened up her A-string and she reached inside her hat

And she said, «You play with this son and I’ll play with that.»

Once in the morning and once at night

I’m not sure that it will help you

But you’ll think it’s alright

Once in the afternoon and once at twilight

Once for the money and again 'bout midnight

I was hanging 'round London trying to pick up a new line

When a man I did not know he invited me to dine

He said, «We can make each other happy you know we’re both the same kind

And I like some of yours if you’d please take some of mine.»

Once in the morning and once at night

I’m not sure that it will help you

But you’ll think it’s alright

Once in the afternoon and once at twilight

Once for the money and again

Once for the money and again

Once for the money and again